Addiction to any substance, behavior, or relationship will eventually lead to a life of isolation and entrapment. The recent death of world-renowned singer Whitney Houston has given awareness of a life that came to an unfortunate ending. One of the saddest realities of her untimely death was that she was alone when she died. Over and over, we read reports of people coming to their demise in a hotel room all alone.

Isolation is one of the main tactics of Satan. The feeling of aloneness usually sends a person into a tail-spin of emotions that can lead to utter despair and death. II Corinthians 3:18 encourages us to live this Christian life with unveiled faces (without masks): “And we, who with unveiled faces all reflect the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his likeness with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit.” (KJV) As we become more transparent with God and others, we’ll more and more bear a resemblance to Christ, experience greater fellowship with those who care about us, and sense the freedom in our spirits that comes from the forgiveness of our sins.

When we come to a place where we’re walking “in the light” concerning our own junk, taking off the “masks” we have been wearing and being real, we need others around us to help. Let’s take a look at what Dr. Jimmy Lee, President Emeritus of Living Free, calls the three types of relationships needed for spiritual growth. A useful tool is to think in terms of 3-12-70.

• 3 represents mentoring: All of us need 2 or 3 godly people in our lives to walk with us and serve as mentors. These are individuals you trust enough to confide in. Mentoring relationships are important in any Christian walk but particularly when you’re dealing with deep issues.

• 12 represents a small group: We all need the interaction and support which are found in a small group of people who are centered around Christ. Small groups can be a safe place where we share our heart with others. Important relationships will be developed in the small group and with time, people will often share about their life-controlling problems.

• 70 represents the larger fellowship of believers: Although not as intimate as the mentoring relationship and the small group, this gathering of believers is important to our spiritual health. As we dwell in the presence of God by aligning ourselves with His Word and by prayer and by face-to-face community, we will be strengthened in our identity in Him, and the glory of the Lord will be seen in our lives.

Jesus set the example for the 3-12-70 principle. He had Peter, James and John in his inner circle. He had the 12 disciples, and then he had the others who were friends among the multitudes. Jesus knew the importance of godly relationships. If you have not done so already, apply the 3-12-70 principle in your own life. It will move you forward in your relationship with God and with others.

And lastly, consider professional help. Some people think that a Christian leader receiving professional help from a counselor is a sign of weakness, but nothing could be more untrue. A qualified Christian counselor who measures truth by the Bible may be just the one to help people find the freedom they have been looking for and help them walk in the light of God’s Word.

Adapted from: Unmasked: Walking in the Light, Dr. Jimmy R. Lee. Christian Management Report, December 2006.